Friday, October 31, 2008

Happy Halloween!



Courtesy of... The Nineties!!

Friday Night Fights - Ladies' Night Round 12: THE GRAND FINALE!!!



For our final round, I'm keeping it simple, folks.


No plot synopsis. No exposition. No issue references. No witty jokes. Just this:


Wonder Woman and Big Barda beating the living crap out of each other.












Because, really, what more do you need?


And that concludes Friday Night Fights. Bahlactus says: "You don't have to go home but you can't stay here."

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Great Arguments in Comic Book History



Uhhh, Lex? You might not want to push this. That test tube you're holding full of liquid that takes away Kryptonian super powers is going to do diddly squat against an android from the planet Colu, unless perhaps he's got some exposed wiring that I don't know about. That big gun he's holding, on the other hand, will turn you into a living action figure in nothing flat. So you might want to just let ol' Brainy have this one. Maybe he'll let you watch!

Saturday, October 25, 2008

A Special Thanks to Elayne

A special thanks goes out to fellow blogger Elayne Riggs, who helped me solve the mystery that's been plaguing me since I started this blog: how to blogroll. I still don't know Hypertext, but I used Elayne's template and instructions to do some detective work with the Control Find and Copy & Paste functions, and - voila!


By George, I think I've got it! As thanks, I put Elayne's link up first in the links section on the right. (Sorry, Sally! I did put you next, though!) More links will be forthcoming.

For those who don't already know, Elayne is married to Robin Riggs, a talented inker whose work I know best from reading Supergirl (the Peter David version), Incredible Hulk (once again, the PAD version), Birds of Prey (ironically, he inked the scene I just used in yesterday's Friday Night Fights), Green Arrow (the Connor Hawke period), Manhunter (the first comeback), and the recent Suicide Squad mini. For more samples of Robin's work, click here.

Ok, Elayne, now that you've helped me master blogrolls, can you help me with Rickrolls?

Friday, October 24, 2008

Friday Night Fights- Ladies' Night Round 11: Toughest. Schoolteacher. Ever.

Today's lesson from Bahlactus: You don't tug on Superman's cape, you don't spit into the wind, you don't pull the mask off the old Lone Ranger....

....and you don't threaten Huntress' kids!

This week's feminine fracas comes to us from Birds of Prey #99. Huntress and Black Canary are facing off against a Turkish gun-runner named Yasemin, whom Helena had previously set up to go to prison. Now Yasemin wants revenge.


They pursue her up the stairs.


Oh, snap!
Big mistake, Yasemin. Here's why:

Hey! Turkish Gun-Runner Lady! Leave those kids alone!

(You didn't really think I'd make it this far through Ladies' Night without visiting the Birds of Prey, did you?)

Next Week: The Grand Finale!!

Here's the funny thing about us "Not-So-Real Americans"

Gov. Sarah Palin claims that only certain regions in our country represent "real Americans". Apparently, only the rural areas of America, aka Small Town America, represents the real America.

As someone who was born in Chicago, has worked there for nearly my entire career , and has lived there or in its near west suburbs my whole life, I apparently don't qualify. Also, I'm not only supporting Barack Obama, but I reside in the same neck of the woods. So I guess I'm a "Not-So-Real American".


Well, Governor, here's an interesting fact about the rest of us, the so-called "Not-So-Real Americans".


We still get to vote.


Since you've shown that you're not exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer, you may not have known about that.


But come the end of November 4th, you're sure as hell going to find out the hard way.


Oh, and lastly? What he said.

Sunday, October 19, 2008

The Manhunter/Spider-Girl Parallels





You've read my pained reactions to the news that DC just cancelled Manhunter, which featured the adventures of lawyer/superhero Kate Spencer. Well, I also found out that during the same week, Marvel announced the cancellation of its Spider-Girl series, which depicted the possible-future adventures of May Parker, Peter (Spider-Man) Parker's future daughter.



Both heroines' titles had previously been cancelled by their respective comic companies, and both titles were resurrected by aggressive letter-writing campaigns of their respective fanbases. Well, that was enough to make me think of the Lincoln/Kennedy Parallels and how I could make a similar list for Spider-Girl and Manhunter.



The trouble is that I've never bought a single of Spider-Girl except the original What-If story that inspired. And while I've purchased and read several issues of Manhunter, I missed a few at the beginning.



But that hasn't stopped me. Here are my list of Manhunter/Spider-Girl Parallels:



1. Both heroines' titles were cancelled and revived after vigorous fan reaction.



2. Both have ancestors who were superheroes from a prior generation. (In Kate's case it's her grandparents Sandra (Phantom Lady) Knight and Arnold (Iron Munro) Munro. In May's case, it's you-know-who.)



3. Both derived their outfits from the uniforms of heroes who were active in the 90's (real-time) but who haven't been seen in several years (once again real-time). (May derived her costume from the Spider-Man costume of Ben Reilly (the Spider-Clone), while Kate's costume is cannibalized from a Darkstar uniform and Jean-Paul Valley's gauntlets.)



4. Both had grandparents who had previously worked for the federal government. (Kate had Iron and Sandra above, while Peter's parents Richard and Mary Parker were federal agents.)



5. Both have fathers with super-strength. (In May's case it's you-know-who once again. In Kate's, it's criminal Walter Pratt.)



6. Both have younger relatives in their bloodline who are starting to manifest super-powers.


7. Both have brown hair.


8. Their real last names both end in "er".


OK, as you can see, I've run out of similarities faster than I thought. This is where the audience participation portion of this post comes in, dear readers.


Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to see if you can come up with a similarity or coincidence between Spider-Girl and Manhunter that is not listed above, and then post it in the comments section.


Go to it!

Friday, October 17, 2008

Friday Night Fights - Ladies' Night - Round 10: Manhunter vs. Johnny Depp



Well, not Johnny Depp, exactly. But she does fight a homicidal killer named Sweeney Todd with a similar modus operandi.


At first, she's not doing too well...




...but after a Cameron Chase assist, she's back in action.....





...and she goes for the throat, leading to this pyrotechnic display......



.....and after Sweeney Todd has gone down, Kate realizes she must now face an even more fearsome threat...


.....THE PAPARAZZI!


But even the Paparazzi are no match for...Bahlactus!!!



(So long for now, Kate!)

DC Cancels Manhunter - AGAIN!!

Dammit! Dammit! Dammit! Dammit! Dammit!

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Mass Debating


After watching this last debate, I can tell you who Barack Obama has reminded me of throughout the latter half of the general election.


And, no, it's not Muhammad Ali with his classic "rope-a-dope" style.


It's this guy:


Sebastian Shaw, leader of the Hellfire Club.

Granted, he and Obama look completely different, and Obama's wardrobe is a touch more...contemporary. Plus, Sebastian is, well, evil. But there are many similarities in their fighting styles.


Both Sebastian and Barack have employed the same modus operandi:


1. Let your opponent take the first, or the first several, shots and absorb the punishment.


2. Use the force of your opponent's attack to strengthen yourself. (The methods to achieve this end are different for the two men: While Sebastian uses his mutant ability to absorb and channel kinetic energy, Obama relies on only his wits and eloquence. Which way is better? Who am I to judge?) And when you have sufficiently strengthened yourself......



3.) BAM! Kick some ass!

John McCain's debate style reminded me of another comic-book villain:




Don't believe me? Check out this debate performance. Looks familiar, huh? Especially in the similar use of the "guilt by association" meme.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Oh, boy!

Here's an intriguing scenario, courtesy of The Onion.



Sunday, October 12, 2008

This is amusing....

Here is an interesting, if obvious, take on those "Mac vs. PC" commercials.

Saturday, October 04, 2008

"Bash Batman Week" - The ELECTRIFYING Conclusion

Did you really think "Bash Batman Week" was only about Batman getting hit in the head?

If so, you're in for a shock.


And since this is the final "Bash Batman" post, I've provided some appropriate music for the occasion.

Approves:





Friday, October 03, 2008

Friday Night Fights - Ladies' Night - Round 9: "Bash Batman Week" With Mistress Jakita


This is how Jakita Wagner celebrates "Bash Batman Week":



Oh, it's the Ladies' Night. And the music's right. Oh, what a Night .

Thursday, October 02, 2008

My 30-Second Review Of The Vice-Presidential Debate

Remember during the Giffen-Dematteis run on Justice League when Mr. Miracle had to leave Earth to go on a universal tour, and he left a Mr. Miracle robot home in his place, and the robot started malfunctioning and repeating the same pre-programmed phrases over and over, until it eventually got destroyed by Despero and made everyone think Scott was dead?


Sarah Palin's performance in the debate reminded me of that robot.


Joe Biden was Despero.

"Bash Batman Week" - World's Finest Bashings

As "Bash Batman Week" continues, I'd like to offer one piece of advice on how our Caped Crusader can drastically reduce his head injury count.


Stay the hell away from this guy:



And that's not all. Sometimes Supes can't even be bothered to get his own hands dirty and delegates the job to someone else.





To be fair, Superman is much nicer to Batman most of the time. But even that's not much comfort, as poor Bats often gets bashed in the head just for standing next to him.




Word to the wise, Bats: Superman can be hazardous to your health.

Other Prehistoric History Questions For Sarah Palin


1. You've recently revealed that you believe that humans and dinosaurs coexisted 6000+ years ago. Do you also believe that dinosaurs and other prehistoric animals served humans as construction equipment, vending machines, and common household appliances?


2. Do you believe that cavemen built the first foot-powered automobiles?


3. Do you believe that the first indoor plumbing system consisted of a granite swimming pool and a wooly mammoth?


4. Did you learn all about prehistoric history by watching these guys?


5. And possibly these guys?


6. Who would win this fight?


7. Do you believe that cavemen have previously encountered extraterrestrial life?


8. And finally, if the earliest cigarettes didn't exist until the 9th century, then how do you explain this?

Wednesday, October 01, 2008

"Bash Batman Week": Don We Now Our Jim Aparo

"Bash Batman Week" continues its madcap pace.

When I put the "Bronze Age Batman" and "bashing" together, one of the first names that comes to mind is the late Jim Aparo, most famous for teaming up with Bob Haney on THE BRAVE AND THE BOLD. When Aparo's Batman hit someone, the punches were so powerful it always looked like at least part of the face of the person on the receiving end was exploding. You knew that that poor schmuck was looking at some serious hospital time. Actually, Aparo's punch scenes were always explosive, but usually it would be Bats doing the giving.



But there were occasions in Aparo's run where our favorite Dark Knight was receiving the punishment rather than dishing it out.



Like this whuppin' at the hands of the Teen Titans, led by his own ward, no less:



No shit, Boy Wonder!


There was even this issue where he took it and dished it out at the same time:




In the words of Marv Albert, "Ooh, that had to hurt!"