Friday Night Fights: Mosquito - Round 2: Madam, I'm Adam!

For tonight's round of Friday Night Fights: Mosquito, I will REFER you to one of the craziest comic book fights I've ever encountered since my MOM and DAD bought me my first comic when I was little older than a TOT. It comes from Zatanna#12, the comic where the Justice League's favorite Mistress of Magic frequently SOLOS, and it's written by Matthew Sturges and illustrated by Stephanie Roux. One look at tonight's fight and you'll understand why this fight has stayed on my RADAR.


Synopsis: Zatanna encounters a vicious killer who calls himself Backslash. He has a magic sword powered by a captive fairy. Why does he go by that name and what does his sword do? Observe what happens when our Magical MADAM uses her power on him...

Oh, POOP!

Oh, no! Zatanna is doomed unless she can find some way to LEVEL the playing field!

Fortunately, it looks like our beleaguered sorceress SEES what the captive fairy is trying to tell her.



WOW!

Let that be a lesson to you, Backslash: LIVE NOT ON EVIL!

Don't worry, folks, Zee didn't violate a central superhero TENET and kill our backslashing baddie.

Our final fight STATS: Zatanna - 1, Backslash - 0!

Coincidentally enough, the title of tonight's fight song by House Of Love just happens to be the name of the captive fairy in our story.

For more reversible ruckuses, click here. And don't forget to do your CIVIC duty and vote!


(You wouldn't want to make our host Spacebooger any REDDER!)

Friday Night Fights: The Mosquito - Round One: With Everything!

For the debut of the new bout our host Spacebooger has cooked up, Friday Night Fights: The Mosquito, I'm bringing you a fight you'll definitely relish, courtesy of Batgirl: Year One#8, a wonderful morsel which has been greatly adorned by writers Chuck Dixon and Scott Beatty as well as artist Marcos Martin (who follows in the footsteps of older greats like Herb Trimpe).


Allow me to help you to play ketchup with my synopsis: Gotham City's Midtown Station is in the process of being robbed by....


....this guy.

Ooh, really scary there, Condiment King! He doesn't threaten them with mustard gas, just regular mustard? What a dip! He's lucky nobody pepper-sprayed him.


Also, I can imagine his thought process: "Hey, why don't I rob something in Gotham City? What's the Worcestershire that can happen?"


But as he hears the hummus of approaching motorcycles, his plans go from sweet to sour.

It's Robin the Boy Wonder alongside our ginger heroine Batgirl. Two young heroes who frequently complement DC's favorite pointy-eared main course.


Ol' Condy tries to as-salt those same two young heroes.

Fortunately, Dick Grayson is a seasoned acrobat, so he avoids getting creamed...

But while our saucy heroine's vehicle is not so lucky, Babs is able to cushion her crash and avoid being turned into guacamole.

Good gravy! That's quite a dressing-down Robin gave you there, C.K.! Maybe from now on you should just packet in.


We don't hold the mayo on this week's fight music by the Smashing Pumpkins.

For more flavor-enhanced fracases, click here. And don't forget to vote!


(And please don't tartar and feather me for all the unsavory puns tonight.)

Friday Night Fights: Assassin - Prize Fight: Quoth The Raven: "SPLAT!"

Welcome to tonight's Friday Night Fights: Assassin Prize Fight. Our host Spacebooger has given us one special rule: It must be a fight scene featuring a fight where the loser “never saw it coming". The final blow should take place either off panel or by surprise to win the championship.


Tonight's surprising slugfest comes from Defenders#10, written by Matt Fraction and illustrated by Jamie McKelvie and Mike Norton. Synopsis: The Defenders (aka Black Cat, Iron Fist, Dr. Strange, Nick Fury, and the Red She-Hulk) have been transported to an alternate-present Earth where nearly everyone is dead. Also? They're stuck at ant-size. They get rescued by Scott "Ant-Man" Lang and his ants and brought to an unknown location. Unknown until now, that is.

In other words, Ant-Man's mystery hideout is in a garbage bag on a New York City rooftop. (Not exactly the Justice League Satellite there, eh, Scotty?) And now that bag is being attacked by ravens.

Which brings us to our host's rule for tonight's fight: That the loser never sees it coming. This raven thinks that the ant-sized heroes will be easy dinner for him.


He's wrong.

Guess we won't be getting any more lip, err beak, from that raven.

NOBODY ever expects a growing angry red lady!

And nobody ever expects Tilly And The Wall, who will be providing tonight's fight music.

For more unexpected embroglios, click here. And don't forget to vote!

It Was 75 Years Ago Today!

Who knew this...

...would lead to this?

Happy 75th Anniversary, you two crazy kids!

Friday Night Fights: Assassin - Round 12: The Forecast Calls For Pain!

There's an old saying that goes: "Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody ever posts a Friday Night Fights entry about it."


Well, uh, maybe that's not how it goes. Just in case, though, I'm posting this entry featuring the debut of Mark Mardon aka the Weather Wizard, longtime member of the Flash's Rogues Gallery who has also fought Superman and the Nestle Quik Bunny. Our meteorological melee comes from Flash#110, written by John Broome, drawn by the recently-deceased Carmine Infantino, and inked by Murphy Anderson and Joe Giella.


Synopsis: The Flash has just foiled the Weather Wizard's scheme to take revenge on the policeman who arrested him, so the Wizard decides to take his revenge on Flash instead. Which leads to tonight's atmospheric altercation.

I can picture the Weather Wizard's opening pickup line: "Hey, babe, want to see my Weather Stick?"


Let's see how ol' Wiz handles his....Weather Stick.

Gee, that went well!


But before the Wizard has any other bright ideas, the Scarlet Speedster comes up with one of his own.

Ouch, that's going to leave a....Mark!


Our fight music for tonight's weather walloping comes from Crowded House.

To weather more barometric battles, click here. And don't forget to vote!