Friday, October 02, 2015

Friday Night Fights: Lights Out: Round 6: Eyes Playing Jokes On You!

Tonight's round of Friday Night Fights: Lights Out will make you think your eyes are playing tricks on you. This refractive ruckus comes from Batman#294 by David V. Reed, John Calnan, and Tex Blaisdell.

Synopsis: In order to flush out the murderer of a Batman impersonator, the real Caped Crusader spread rumors of his own death, disguised himself as Two-Face, and arranged a series of fact-finding trials, with Ra's al Ghul as the judge, during which major Bat-villains, as well as Lex Luthor, claimed credit for ol' Bats' murder, with "Two-Face" tasked with finding them innocent. (It was the 70's, just roll with it.) The end goal was to make the real murderer reveal his proof. Said "real killer" turned out to be the Joker.

However, capturing the Clown Prince Of Crime proves to be a bit more....difficult.


For tonight's fight music, check out these lightbending lyrics by the Who.

For more illusory altercations, click here. And don't forget to vote!

Friday, September 25, 2015

Friday Night Fights: Lights Out - Round 5: Hulk-Bustin'!

Tonight's round of Friday Night Fights: Lights Out is a mixture of red, gold, purple, and green, courtesy of Iron Man#132, by David Michelinie, Jerry Bingham, and Bob Layton.

Synopsis: Stark Industries attempts a new treatment to cure Bruce Banner of his Hulk transformations. Long story short: It doesn't work out.

Ol' Shellhead decides to take advantage of the Emerald Goliath's momentary disorientation.

Does it work? See for yourself.

Sure, Tony ends up overloading his armor and being trapped in it immobile in the next panel or so, but....still counts!

The fight music for this single-blow slugfest is by the Rolling Stones.

For more Hulk-hammering, click here. And don't forget to vote!

Friday, September 18, 2015

Friday Night Fights: Lights Out - Round 4: Terra Vs. Terra!

Howdy, Pardners! It's time for another rip-snortin' round of Friday Night Fights: Lights Out, this time featuring my all-time favorite Superman villain. Tonight's western-style wallopin' comes courtesy of Action Comics#470, by Cary Bates, Curt Swan, and Tex Blaisdell.

Synopsis: A blue-skinned alien has arrived in Metropolis and has been apparently defeated by Superman, only for both combatants to be interrupted by....Terra-Man.

Ok, so now you're wondering: What the hell just happened? TWO Terra-Men?

Here's the story: Terra had come to Metropolis to challenge Superman. The fight between the two ended with T-M apparently killing Supes and leaving him buried in a "Boot Hill" type grave. What really happened was that the Cosmic Cowboy had used his super-futuristic-pulling-things-out-of-his-ass alien science to change Superman's image to resemble his own. Why did he do all that? To trick the aforementioned blue-skinned alien above, who just happens to be the brother of the alien Terra-Man killed in his origin story (artfully summarized here), into killing the "Terra"-formed Man Of Steel instead of T-M himself. 

Got all that? Good!

Two things about this story have always left me scratching my head:

First, Judging by Terra-Man's dialogue and actions on the above page, he already seems to have forgotten his own plan.

And second, throughout this issue, we kept seeing scenes of a cop repeatedly encountering a homeless man, with ominous foreshadowing that said homeless man was essential to the story. Instead, he was used for the sole purpose of setting up this clever joke toward the story's end:

Jeez, Cary Bates, with the distance you went to get to that Terra-ble pun you could've circled Earth repeatedly and saved Lois Lane.

The fight music for tonight's gunslingin' go-round is by The Church.

For more rootin-tootin' rounds, click here. And don't forget to vote, Pardners!

Friday, September 04, 2015

Friday Night Fights: Lights Out - Round 2: Growing Into You!

For tonight's round of Friday Night Fights: Lights Out, I'm heading into the far-flung future, courtesy of Superboy#212 by Jim Shooter and Mike Grell.

Synopsis: Six Legion Of Super-Heroes tryouts who were previously rejected for having the same powers as an existing Legionnaire join forces to challenge their Legion counterparts to a fight to determine who deserves to be on the team. They proceed to beat up the Legionnaires before getting thrown out by Superboy. Mad at the Teen Of Steel's interference, the six Legionnaires challenge the rejects to a duel the next morning, during which time they win by pulling the classic Silver/Bronze Age trick of...switching opponents.

For tonight's round I'm focusing on my favorite of the rematch fights: Phantom Lad vs. Phantom Girl.

Wait, what's that at Phantom Girl's bell-bottomed feet? Could it be...?

Yes, it is!

The classic Shrinking Violet Growing Uppercut!

Tonight's fight music comes from Soul Asylum.

For more futuristic fracases, click here. And don't forget to vote!

Friday, August 28, 2015

Friday Night Fights: Lights Out - Round 1: The Phaseout!

Welcome to our humble host' Spacebooger's latest bout, titled Friday Night Fights: Lights OutFor the first round, I will be employing this Ultimate embroglio from All-New Ultimates#6 written by Michael Fiffe and illustrated by Amilcar Pinna. I must also give special mention to the beautiful coloring here by Nolan Woodard, who evokes the work of John Higgins on The Watchmen and The Killing Joke

Synopsis: It's the Ultimates vs. the Serpent Skull Gang in a showdown at West Side Church. Here we have Anaconda attempting to put the squeeze on Kitty Pryde.....for all the good it does her.

Wow, Anaconda just can't win, huh?

In honor of tonight's victor, here's our fight music by The Presidents Of the United States Of America. (Warning: some language may be NSFW.)

For more phasing fracases, click here. And don't forget to vote!

Friday, August 07, 2015

Friday Night Fights: SOCKER! - Prize Fight: Hawks Of War!

For tonight's  Friday Night Fights: SOCKER! Prize Fight, our honorable host Spacebooger has decreed that each entry must be a fistfight lasting at least 3 "rounds" aka panels. "Fist" fight, you say? Then how about an IRON Fist fight, courtesy of Marvel Premiere#23, written by Chris Claremont and illustrated by Pat Broderick and Bob McLeod?

Here's the story: An enhanced but insane ex-Viet Nam veteran named Warhawk has kidnapped Colleen Wing (who looks and sounds radically different here than her later appearances), thinking in his delusion that she is his wife and that they are still in 'Nam. Iron Fist arrives to rescue her.

And down goes Warhawk!

Tonight's fist-pumpin' fight music is by Motorhead.

For more fists of fury, click here. And don't forget to vote!

Friday, July 24, 2015

Friday Night Fights: Wildcat - Round 12: Mongul-Mashing!

For the final round of Friday Night Fights: Wildcat, I'm going with one of my all-time favorite super-skirmishes courtesy of Superman#32 by Roger Stern, Kerry Gammill, and Dennis Janke. Synopsis: After exiling himself into space, the Man Of Steel has found himself captured by Warworld, where he is forced to engage in a fight to the death with the reigning champion Draaga. Supes defeats Draaga but refuses to kill him, incurring the wrath of Warworld's ruler Mongul, who attacks and defeats our hero and brings him back to the royal palace. Superman breaks free from his bonds, and the rematch is on.


Now here's tonight's ferocious fight music from Thin Lizzy.

For more Mongul-ian melees, click here. And don't forget to vote!